Long weekends are for suckers

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Once upon a time, there lived a woman who loved long weekends. Long weekends meant heading to the beach with my boyfriend for a few days of fun. It might sometimes have meant a camping trip, or even just a lazy weekend at home seeing friends, bands or movies. These times are no longer.

Almost five years into it, and I still grieve for the loss of freedom, spontaneity, and a small handbag. As my work colleagues eagerly gear up for a long weekend, I find my stress levels creeping up, thinking what the hell are we going to do to contain this lot for three whole days? It wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t that every waking moment (and there are a lot of them) revolves around kids kids kids. Sometimes yes, it is actually really fun. Most of the time it is repetitive, exhausting and frankly, boring. I adore my little guys. But 72 hours of them in a row without a break is simply more than any man or woman, can take.

We have barely made it through two days and we’re knackered. We’ve had four trips to the park, church and sunday school, hours in the backyard and very extended bath time. Hey if they’re happy, leave them in there I say. Another whole day to go. Oh and the kicker is, I work 4 days and guess which day is my day off with all three kids at home? You guessed it, Tuesday. So that would be 4 days in a row for me, ending in a 12 hour stint all by myself.

The new phases that we have entered are bringing us to a new level of crazy. We’ve decided to drop our formerly 2 hour day naps down to one hour or less. Hey who needs rest? We’ve decided that whatever twin 1 has, twin 2 wants (and vice versa) and will get it whether or not blood needs to be shed. We’ve decided that food is no longer a necessity and is to be thrown and wasted whenever possible. The only time that food might be deemed of benefit is when Mum hasn’t got it ready yet, at which time we will scream bloody murder until it appears, at which time we’ll throw it. And finally, we’ve decided that the only way to communicate is with ear busting screaming at a level never before tolerated by normal human ears.

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